So yesterday I went up to Burlington and hit Macy's, Nordstrom, Lord & Taylor, Sears and Kohl's, and also the Marshall's and Filene's Basement in the Arsenal Mall, and found exactly zero reasonable gray pinstripe suits in my size, let alone two-button, side-vent and not stupidly expensive.
Today I headed out to the execrable "Natick Collection", and if that failed was going to try going back to Burlington, where there's a Men's Wearhouse, and/or down south to the Westgate Mall. After Macy's, Sears, JC Penney, Lord & Taylor, Neiman Marcus and Nordstrom in Natick, I was not feeling heartened, and was close to giving up and getting the Alfani suit I found at Macy's, which wasn't really what I wanted, and didn't seem to be great quality, but was closer than anything else I'd seen. But, there's a Filene's Basement near there too, so I figured I'd try that first.
And, lo and behold, a pretty nice Joseph Abboud suit in my size, in a very good gray with faint pinstripes, at a reasonable price, with side vents...and three buttons. After some consideration and trying it on, I decided to get it anyway. It's a nice suit and looks good on me, and as much as I prefer two button suits, if that's the only problem with it, well, I can live with that. Need to find a local tailor and get the trousers finished.
So, total suit disaster averted. I'm sure you're all quite relieved.